To Conquer, To Overcome
by My Writing Is This
Summary: Everyone knew what The Hunger Games meant. What everyone goes through. Why we were forced to do it. I was no different. I was almost in the clear. Then the 74th Hunger Games happened. Only it wasn't just me who had to live it. I wasn't alone. Love. Life.
1. Chapter One

_****_**Disclaimer: I own nothing from The Hunger Games!**

**A/N: Here is chapter one of my newest story. I hope you enjoy it. Reviews are always welcome and appreciated!**

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><p><em><strong>Chapter One<strong>_

It was hard not to be happy on a night like this. The sun was setting, hues of color reaching high into the sky. A warm breeze blowing through the remaining fields that were still a lush green, perfect for the grazing herds. My mount shifts below me and I rub his mighty neck. Nickering, he gently shakes his head before looking back at me. Nodding at him I allow him to turn and he takes me back home, eager for his evening meal. I, however, was nowhere near ready to return. For come tomorrow, my life was in risk of a horrible change.

Reaching the stables, I place Kahn back into his stall. The one permanent stall in the whole district. Giving him his dinner, I moved through the stables, looking at all the horses I've taken care of since birth. Knowing that one day they'd end up being taken away to be used in the Capitol. Walking along the beaten path, I let my eyes wander over the grimy white exterior. The two story home was the biggest in the district. Despite that it was still a shabby place to live. Heaving a heavy sigh as I reach the back door to my home. I was nodded at as I made my way to the kitchen. A meager meal was being made as I grabbed an apple from a bowl on the table. It was a rarity to even have any and I couldn't help myself from grabbing one as I passed by.

Sinking my teeth into it, I moved from the kitchen, down the hall, and then up the back staircase, leading to my room. Slipping inside, I hoped to be left alone till I was forced to go downstairs for dinner. I hated the night before. The morning of was even worse. My father was the mayor of District 10 but even that didn't save us from the hardship that had become the norm in Panem. Food was scarce. Our main focus was livestock and they were fed better then any of us here. We were largely cattle, owning only a few herds of our own, the rest scattered throughout the district, but we also provided the Capitol, the controlling city of Panem, with their horses and domestic birds. My family had the largest stables in the district and was known for their quality. At sixteen I was put in charge of the horses. Making sure they were well cared for and that the Capitol was sent all of the best horses. The ones to pull their precious chariots. A pit fell in my stomach just at the thought of it.

Lying back on my bed, I stared at the ceiling. _Last year. All I have to do is make it through tomorrow._ Being the youngest of three children, I was the last to turn eighteen. The last in danger of going to the Hunger Games. The Games resulted after the districts rebelled against the empire seventy-three years ago, this year being the seventy-forth. One boy and one girl from each district were required to participate in the Games. Their names drawn from a bowl. Starting at age twelve, until eighteen, your name is entered, accumulating to seven by the end. That's as long as your family can support themselves without need from the Capitol. If more is needed you can get a tesserae containing a year's meager amount of grain and lamp oil. My father always said it wasn't worth it. That we would survive. Even during the hardest of times, I never did this. He never allowed any of us to request one. But he was right, we always did survive. Besides, seven was a small number to have to pick from. The chances so small after all the other families children repeatedly asked for tesserae. Some kids had their name in as many as forty times. Some higher. Some lower. My mother told me not to worry. The chances of me getting chosen were just too slim it was almost impossible. She's told me this since the first year I was eligible. But the fear of being chosen is always so great that I find it all consuming. My two older brothers, Collis and Zephyr, are three and five years older then I. Neither of them was ever drawn to join in the Hunger Games. My parents were grateful for that. Now they just had their daughter to get through one more day and the whole family would be pardoned from the horrible display of horrific death. Watching every year as each district gave up their precious children to be slaughtered. I suddenly felt sorry for the cows. As I pondered the horrible fate we put upon the animals I help raise, I hear my name being called from downstairs.

"Letty!" My mothers voice calls. "Dinner is ready!" I sigh, not wanting to go down. "Letty Mason, get down here now!" She finally calls up to me.

"Coming!" I call back and drag myself toward her annoyed voice.

All eyes are on me as I go into the dining room. It seems like the whole family is walking on egg shells around me. I'm not made of glass. Even if I am picked tomorrow, I have no choice but to go. No choice but to leave them all behind with a good chance of never seeing them again. Though I wished it was these faces that I would miss most.

"Come and sit." Father tells me. I obey, forcing a small smile for him. "I know you're nervous, but do not fear. One more day and we can all take a deep breath."

"I know." I nod and force a bigger smile.

Out of my family, it's Zephyr that seems the most withdrawn about it. I'm his little sister. For as long as I can remember he has sworn to protect me. From everything that life should throw at me. But this is the one thing that he has no control over. He can not save me if I am called. He can not go with me to protect me from what is out there. I will be alone. I think this thought scared him more then it has ever scared me. And I've been very afraid over the years.

"You need to eat something." My mother tells me after I've continuously pushed my food around my plate versus eating it.

"I'm not hungry." I reply to her.

"I know but –" She starts.

"You need your strength." Zephyr interrupts, his tone harsher then it usually is.

I didn't even respond to him. I simply sat up and started to eat. Once my stomach was full, I excused myself from the table and left the house, once again going to the stables. I made sure everyone was ready for the night, just a lantern for lighting. The night was quiet, the sounds of it subtle compared to the thoughts in my head. Feeling light headed, I leaned against the water trough and took a series of deep breaths, opening my eyes to see a paler me reflected in the water. My long brown hair was braided to the side, falling over my shoulder, practically touching the water. My green eyes slightly glistening as I felt the onset of tears. Despite being the mayor's daughter, I was still slightly too thin, but more filled out then most of the girls here, adding a heavy sense of guilt to all the other emotions that were running through my head.

"Feeling guilty?" A seductive male voice said softly from behind me.

Smiling, I straightened and turned to see him leaning against the door frame, his tall form filling the doorway. He was well built but not as bulky as some of the boys in the district but you could see the muscles rippling in his arms as he shifted. His straight brown hair falling over his forehead, brushed to the side. He moved forward and put his hands gently on my waist.

"We have to stop meeting like this." I smiled at him.

"Then convince your father that I am worthy of you." He said as he stepped up closer to me.

"Believe me, I'm trying to." I said as his lips, ever so lightly, graced my jaw line.

"Try harder." He whispered before stepping away from me.

"Hey." I frowned at him.

"Seriously, how are you feeling?" He asked, the seductive tone gone.

"I'm fine." I replied, a little too calmly.

"Letty." He frowned.

"Brendan." I frowned back.

"I know you better then that." He stated as he held his hand out to me.

"Then you shouldn't have to ask." I replied and put my hand in his. He pulled me into him. Resting my head against his chest, listening to his heartbeat, I finally felt a little peace. "Besides, you know me better then anyone."

"That's only because I'm stubborn." He smiled, resting his chin on the top of my head.

"I was stubborn first." I told him with the hint of a smile.

"You brought me back."

"Someone had to."

"It'll be the same for you."

"_If_ I go." I said and looked up at him. "I haven't been chosen yet."

"I know. I just don't want to run out of time." He said and brushed my cheekbone with the back of his fingers.

"We won't." I told him matter-of-factly. "We made a promise to each other. I don't intend of breaking that promise."

"Good." He said and finally kissed me, making my heart race and my skin start to heat up.

His kiss didn't last long enough. He wrapped his arms around me, resting his forehead against mine. There was something about the way he was acting tonight. We'd survived three reapings in the past. This year would be no different.

Brendan Lock was the victor of the 68th Hunger Games at the age of fifteen. He had been pegged as the least dangerous by the twenty-three other tributes. He was the pretty boy from 10 who didn't know anything other then how to use a plow and breed cattle. He kept to himself, keeping himself safe, through over half of the Games. Until then, he allowed everyone else to take care of each other, by killing them. When the time came to fight, he turned out to be much more skilled then anyone had anticipated. He conquered the other tributes and managed to come out on top against the male from District 2. He was wounded badly and he came back more broken then anyone could have imagined. It was over a year after he returned that I met him. I was running the horses, keeping them fit for when they would be hauled off to the Capitol. We wandered over to the cattle fields. They enjoyed seeing something different and they needed a good run. The first time I saw him I had the inclination of just leaving him be. He sat huddled at the base of a tree, his knees up against his chest, his head buried in his arms as he rocked back and forth, inaudible words coming from him. One of the horses was drawn to him, smelling him over. Dismounting from Kahn, I went to reign in my fellow horse, but paused at the site of him. Pushing the horse back toward the others, I was going to just leave, but then he looked up at me and his blue eyes pierced me in a way no others had before or ever since.

"Hey, are you okay?" I had asked him. He cringed away from me. "It's okay. It's okay."

He started to mutter something that I couldn't understand. For whatever reason, I put my hand on his arm, gently moving the hair from his forehead with the other. He just looked at me but stopped muttering and rocking. He didn't say anything to me but just kept his eyes trained on mine. After he calmed down I smiled at him sweetly.

"You're Brendan." I smiled. He just looked at me. I didn't know what to say to him. He was clearly not the same boy who had left for the games. Even then I didn't know him. "You were very brave." Was all I could think to tell him. He continued to just look at me. Leaving him, I didn't think I'd see him again other then in passing.

However, I had been wrong about that. After that first meeting, I saw him nearly every day. He came back to school and I'd catch him watching me. He would never speak to me, even though I tried to speak to him. Soon it just became a smile from me with an occasional one from him. It was months of this silent exchange before we actually spoke.

"Hello." He said almost in a whisper.

I was helping my father plow the fields, the sound of his voice made me jump. Turning, I looked at the strange boy.

"Hello." I replied, straightening so I could face him. He kept his eyes on me but didn't say anything. "Dad! Careful with that chain, Zephyr found a chink in it up toward the harness." My dad waved at me in response. Turning back to Brendan, I looked at him expectantly. "Everything okay?" I asked when he remained silent. He looked like he was going to reply when there was a bang as the chain broke, slamming back against the plow, and his arms flew to the sides of his head as he dropped to his knees. He started to rock mumbling to himself. Seeing that my father and horse were okay, I looked down at Brendan. "Hey, hey, it's okay." I said dropping next to him. "Brendan…" I said and gently pulled his arms away from his head. "It's okay. Nothing is going to hurt you." He just looked at me. "It must be hard. The things you've seen and done. I can't imagine what that's like."

"Nightmares." He told me sadly.

I nodded at him, gently rubbing his arms. "But you're home and you're safe." He simply nodded back at me.

After that we spent a lot of time together. He hardly ever spoke. I'd go on and on about my family and the horses. I'd talk about anything and everything while he sat and listened. He spent more time with me then he did with his own family. Though it was in such a way that my parents treated him more as a stray dog rather then a person. They never approved of the time I spent with him. The nights I'd stay awake just to help him through his latest nightmare.

Before I knew it another year had gone by and our relationship remained the same. He was like the ever watchful dog as I moved though my days. Talking to him with little to no response. It wasn't until the summer of the second year that he finally started to open up. We were reading in front of the fire, enjoying the quiet, when he just started to talk. He divulged so much information in just a few hours that I didn't dare ask a question in case he would clam up again. He explained so much that I saw him in a completely different light. He wasn't just the quiet boy who followed me around. He was _so_ much more then that. He told me of his passions and the way he wished things would be. He thanked me for not giving up on him after we first met. For seeing something in him that even his own family seemed to ignore. That was when he turned his life around. That was when he became Brendan again. That's when he became the center of my world. At fifteen, it was clear to me what I wanted. What I could have. He was right in front of me. Never thinking that this would ever happen to me, it sprung up out of nowhere. But I was grateful. For even with the closeness of my family, being with him lifted that to something higher.

So to this day, the day before my final reaping, I have had the love and support of not only my family, but of the victor of District 10. He had become my world in the past three years. It was strange to think that it had been that long. Knowing what I wanted and yet feeling like I can't fully appreciate it until tomorrow is over. Till I can relax and realize that I don't have to worry anymore. That I will be safe from the Capitol and be able to live the life I wanted. But there was a nagging feeling that my time of luck was over and that tomorrow I would have to say goodbye to him. If that happened, he would be with me the whole time, as a mentor, but if I didn't come home, he would be, once again, thrown into darkness with no one to pull him out.


	2. Chapter Two

_**Chapter Two**_

The reaping.

Two tributes.

Twenty-four in the arena.

Only one comes out.

I had to keep going through this over and over again in my head. Wrapping my head around what it would mean to be chosen. I was already in my nicest ivory dress, simple and sleek, flowing down my body. I was roped off with all the other eighteen-year-old girls in front of the Justice Building, everyone with a solemn expression on their faces. I can feel Brendan's eyes on me as I stare at the ground, unable to meet his eyes. Every year before now I have confidently looked at him, knowing that I wasn't going to be picked. But I can't do that this year. I can't do it. I looked behind me and see my family's faces at the front of the crowd. Zephyr won't meet my eyes, while Collis smiles at me. My mother looks strong but I know that they are just as worried as I am. Their luck has been so good over the years, it has to break at some point. This moment feels like the one. I wish I could place it…but I can't.

It's then that my father steps up to the microphone and reads the list of District 10 victors. There's been only the one. He says Brendan's name and he come on stage, shakes his hand, before taking a seat in the three chairs on the stage. Stepping aside, my father takes his chair as Rona Withers, the District 10 escort, steps up to the microphone, and the 74th Hunger Games reaping begins.

"Hello, District 10 and welcome to the reaping of the 74th Hunger Games!" She grins to the crowd.

I want to look up at her, but I know I'll see Brendan sitting next to my father. I can feel both their eyes on me. I don't think I can face the look in their eyes. But at the same time I need them to help me. Slowly, I lift my head; my eyes go straight to Brendan who has already been looking at me. He gives me the subtlest of smiles, a hopeful glint in his eyes. My father has his usual composed expression but I can see the fear in his eyes. Unable to handle it, I looked back at Brendan, mouthing 'I love you' to him. He winked and lowered his head to hide the smile that was threatening to break through. Today was not a day for smiling.

I hadn't even realized that Rona had stopped talking until Brendan's face fell and his eyes shot to her. "Now to draw the female tribute."

She always made it sound as easy as picking cattle. My stomach turned as her hand went into the bowl. My name was in only seven times. Others it was much, much more, and yet I felt like I couldn't breathe. My eyes locked onto Rona's hand as she gripped a piece of paper. It seemed to take an eternity for her hand to finally pull it out. It seemed to take even longer for her to unfold it. I felt dizzy from lack of breath when she read the name and looked up with a big grin on her face. This wasn't unusual; she always looked like that when she read the names.

"Letty Mason!" She called out.

Whatever air I had left, left me now. For a fraction of a second I stood slightly hunched over before quickly gathering my composer. Straightening, I held my head high as I walked toward the podium. My breathing was the most prominent thing in my ears. The only thing keeping me moving, moving toward my death. I couldn't meet Brendan's or my father's eyes, but out of the corner of my eye I saw my father gripping Brendan's wrist. Could see his distinct shaking as I passed them making my way toward Rona and the podium. The crowd was silent. You could hear a pin drop. When I finally reached the podium, Rona put her arm around me, turning me to the crowd.

"And here is Letty Mason!" She grinned. "Now, onto the male!"

I stood and faced the crowd, looking over them rather then at them. As Rona moved to the opposite bowl I finally dared to look at the crowd, wondering who I'd be going in with. As hard as I tried not to look, my eyes fell on my brothers and mother in the front row. Only there was only Collis and my mother who was hiding the tears that were running down her cheeks. Zephyr must have left right after. I only hoped he'd return when I was given my hour of goodbyes.

Tearing my eyes off my family, I turned to Rona as she unfolded the paper, yelling Jace Thorn into the crowd. He was in the same year as me. Two eighteen-year-olds with a horrible case of bad luck. As he stepped forward my eyes locked onto him. He wasn't much taller then me. His light brown hair was cut short and he was built very muscular from working in the fields for so long. His skin tanned from hours spent in the sun. He had a very confident air about him as he stepped up next to Rona and me.

Now that we were chosen, it was my father's time to step up to the podium. Time for the Time of Treason to be read. A requirement from the Capitol to make sure we don't forget what we're doing here. The whole time he's reading I can here the effort he's putting in to sounding normal. To sound unaffected by his tribute daughter just an arms reach away. As he finished he turned and met my eyes. A father's pain written inside of them. The anthem started to play. It barely got through the opening notes when my arm was grabbed and I turned to see Brendan's frantic expression. Before I knew it he was pulling me away, running toward the steps leading away from the stage. Before we made it to the stairs, Peacekeepers, soldiers of the Capitol, were stopping us. I've never seen Brendan this way. He was vicious with them. Fighting them, trying to get me away from them. To get me away from all of this. Away from my death sentence. But it would never work. The harder he fought, the harder they fought back. A scream erupted from my throat as he was hit over the head. He fell back, landing on his stomach. I immediately went to him, holding my arms out to the Peacekeepers, telling them that this was a misunderstanding.

"You have to stop." I say to Brendan as I help him up. "There's nothing you can do."

"I won't let you go." He tells me urgently.

Smiling at him, I take his head in my hands. "You can't stop it." I told him as tears spring to my eyes. "And I need you to pull it together. I need my mentor fit to help me through this. I need you, Baby. I need you to be strong for me. To not be blinded by this. No matter what happens."

"I can't lose you." He told me as a tear slides down his cheek.

"You'll never lose me." I smiled at him. "No matter what happens you have me. All of me. Brendan, you can't drown inside yourself because of this. You need to stay focused."

"No!" He screamed as he took my head in his hands.

His eyes were distant as he started to mutter to himself. Shutting them as he continued. I felt a sense of panic as I saw him reverting to the boy from the Games. The boy who was buried so deep within himself it took two years for him to come back.

"Don't do that." I told him. "Don't go there." He stopped muttering and met my eyes. The anthem was nearly done. "I love you. I. Love. You." I told him slowly. "You need to keep it together for me. Can you do that?" I ask him frantically as the final notes of the anthem sound. He nods at me.

I kissed him quickly before my father wrapped his arm around me and turned me back toward the podium and the crowd. Everyone looked shocked as to what had just happened. I hadn't remembered until now that this was all being televised. I didn't want to think about what we looked like. What Panem would think of Brendan's outburst or if they had gotten our whole conversation. My father turned me toward Jace and whispered for me to shake his hand. I did and then Peacekeepers were escorting me and Jace into the Justice building. I was led to a room and then left alone. Once, when I was eleven, I had watched a girl tribute try and run. She tried to be strong but as the anthem ended she ran for it, leaping into the crowd and trying to get away. But she was caught and still went to the Games. We watched her die first. They had added additional Peacekeepers after that. I knew that Brendan stood no chance of getting me out of here. I never thought he would have even attempted such a thing. But he did. I just hope he didn't get into any major trouble for it. I couldn't bear it if he didn't get to come with me. If he couldn't be there for me through all of this.

The room they've left me in is just as fancy as I'd imagined it would be. There was a velvet couch and chairs. Too fancy for normal people but the Justice Buildings were always fancy. I tried focusing on that, preparing myself for the next hour. The time allotted for me to say goodbye to my family. My parents and Collis were the first to arrive. As soon the door opened, my mother came rushing in with tears streaming. She pulled me into a tight embrace and sobbed as she played with my hair and rubbed my back. I didn't know what to say to her. I wanted to reassure her but there was no use in that. I was more then likely going to come back in a wooden box. My father held me longer then my mother. He was shaking but he was strong enough not to let a tear fall. Collis was withdrawn and silently cried as I embraced him.

"It's going to be okay." I told them. "No matter what happens…it's going to be okay. You have each other."

"Don't talk like that." My mother told me.

"Don't be irrational." I retorted. "You know as well as I the odds we're playing at."

"Come home." My father said putting his hand on my face.

"I'll do my best." I smiled at him. "Take care of each other."

"We will." Collis finally spoke. "We will. As long as you promise to take care of yourself."

"I will." I promised pulling him into a hug. "I love you." I told him gently.

"I love you too."

Before we could have a complete family breakdown, the Peacekeepers came to tell us their time was up. I must have said 'I love you' twenty times as they walked out the door. Only I was surprised when the next person to visit was Zephyr.

"Why didn't you come with everyone else?" I asked him as he embraced me in a vice grip.

"I love you. I love you more then anyone else." He replied.

"I love you too." I said taking his head in my hands. "You need to take care of the others. Only you can keep them from getting lost in this."

"You need to come home." He replied.

"Zephyr, you know that I can't promise anything. I will try. You know I will. But…" I said unable to go on.

"You can do it. I know you can." He told me urgently. "I can't stand this. Not being able to volunteer for you."

"I know." I replied nodding at him. "I know. But it's better this way. Don't worry about me. I'll be okay."

"I'm just glad Brendan will be with you."

"Me too."

"You really love him don't you?" Zephyr asked.

"More then anything." I smiled at him.

"He'll keep you safe." He nodded at me.

"He'll do everything he can." I told him. "But there is something that I need you to do." I waited for him to agree before I continued on. "If I don't make it you have to keep Brendan from drowning inside his misery or from killing himself. You can't let him become that muttering boy. You need to take care of him for me. He needs to be taken care of. His family won't do it. You need to do it. For me."

"I'll look out for him." He nodded.

"Thank you." I nodded and hugged him tightly. "I love you so much."

Now our time was up. One more person was waiting to see me. I would have the most time with him. I just wanted to hold him and tell him that everything would be okay. The next time the door opened Brendan came in with a tear stained face, shaking with the pent up sobs. I'd seen him like this many times before. But this was worse. So much worse. He stumbled forward, falling to his knees as he wrapped his arms around my waist. He started to sob into me like I've never seen him before. Finally breaking down, I let silent tears fall as I stroked the back of his head. Trying to reassure him that it was all going to be okay. When he started to get a hold of himself, I fell to my knees in front of him, taking his head in my hands.

"I love you." I said kissing him passionately.

He kissed me back so intensely that for a second I forgot where I was and what was going to happen. For a moment it was just me and him.

"I love you more then anything in this world." He whispered to me as he stroked my hair.

"It's going to be okay." I smiled at him, wiping the tears from his cheeks. He shook his head. "Yes, it is. You're going to be there with me the entire time. How can I not succeed?"

"I love you." He repeated.

"Brendan, are you listening to me at all?" I asked him. He just looked at me. "I know what you're thinking and I can see it in your eyes. You can't fall apart. Not now."

"You can't go to the Games. You won't make it." He finally told me.

"Thank you for your vote of confidence." I smiled at him.

"Don't joke about this." He said standing and pacing the room.

"I'm not joking." I replied standing and crossing my arms. "You know me better then anyone. You know what I'm capable of. I might stand a chance." He just looked at me. "I need my mentor. If I have any chance at all to get back home it lies with you. You have the power."

"And I can't focus with you in the arena!" He yelled at me. "How am I supposed to be any good to you when I am terrified of losing you? Do you have any idea how scared I am?"

"I'm just as scared as you are!" I yelled back at him. "How do you think I feel? I'm going to die in just a matter of days!"

"Stop it!" He yelled grabbing me by the arms, giving me a sharp jerk. "You're not going to die! I won't let you!"

"Okay." I nodded at him. "That's better."

"What?" He frowned at me.

"Now you don't sound like a man who's given up." I told him. "You need to stay strong, Brendan. Whether you like it or not I'm going to the Games and I need you to teach me what to do. To find me sponsors and to just _be_ there for me. I need you to be my mentor. We no longer have the luxury of being a couple anymore. We have a very limited time before I get ripped away from everything I know. So please…just…please."

For a second we simply faced off. He didn't have a retort and I didn't know what else to say to him. Precious seconds ticked by before he rushed to me, pulling me into his arms, his lips meeting mine in a fierce kiss. Soon I was on the couch, his hands ravaging me in a way he never had before. But I didn't mind. My hands were doing the exact same thing to him.

I had just pulled my dress back on and kissed him again when the door opened and the Peacekeepers told us that his time was up. He was back to being him again and I felt much better about everything. But from now on we'd have to be careful on how personal we were. We were going to be very much watched from here on out.

Once all the guests were gone we were escorted to the train station where a Capitol train awaited us. There were cameras everywhere wanting to get a good look at the tributes. Jace looked at me as we paused for the cameras. I nodded at him and he did the same before we were led into the train. It was even more exquisite then the Justice Building. And much faster then any other train I had ever seen. At this rate we'd be at the Capitol within a day.

Jace and I would have our own quarters with a bedroom, dressing area, and private bathroom. The drawers are filled with fine clothes and Rona had given us free reign. Everything was at our disposal. I was happy to finally be free of her. It's not that she was an unpleasant person. It just seemed as if all district escorts were too chipper to be sending people off to be slaughtered. There was just something wrong with it. Sitting on the bed, I stared at my feet. I wasn't sure what to do. Wasn't sure where to go. I wanted Brendan, but I didn't know where he was.

Sighing, a sense of defeat coming over me, I went to the bathroom. Turning on the water, I couldn't help but smile as the hot water flowed over my hand. Quickly pulling off my clothes, I stepped into the shower, letting the water flow over me. For a moment there was a sense of contentment. A moment where my situation didn't seem as bleak as it was. Then that moment was over. Tears were suddenly streaming down my face. Sobs retched from my throat without permission. I couldn't control them. My body shaking as if I were freezing, even though the hot waters vapor surrounded me. Leaning against the wall I let out all the pent up emotions that I had buried for the sake of my family. For the sake of Brendan. For the sake of all who were watching. Not wanting to be seen as weak.

Before I could stop the sobs and return my composure, I felt hands on my arms. I knew their touch only too well. Turning, I buried my face in Brendan's bear chest. Letting him hold me while I cried. Let him carry my burden even though I had vowed to never let him see me this weak. I was his strength. I was no good to him like this. I was no good to anyone. He gently rocked me before gently guiding me to the floor. Sitting against the wall, the water still running over us, he held me. His hands gentle as they moved against my skin, gently moving the hair from my face as he placed a kiss against my forehead. He didn't say a word, simply held me.

"We're going to make it through this." He told me matter-of-factly as I started to catch my breath after the worst of it.

"How can you be sure?" I asked him.

"Because I believe in you." He replied, his tone giving off such an overpowering calm I melted against him. "I believe in us. I believe that if you love someone enough that anything is possible."

"You really think so?" I asked looking up at him.

"Yes." He said with a small smile. "And I love you enough to move mountains to keep you safe. I love you enough to believe that we can survive anything. Even the Hunger Games."

"I'm scared, Brendan. I'm so scared that I'm not going to make it. That once it starts I'll never see you again." I confided and nestled against him again.

The tears started to flow again as my mind rolled the thought over and over again in my head. He made gentle shushing sounds in my ear. We stayed under the hot water until there was a pounding on the door. Supper was ready. Finally shutting the water off, Brendan and I got out and dried off. He had come in clean clothes and helped me find a decent outfit amongst the drawers. When I was dressed, I combed my hair and pinned it back partially with the delicate gemmed pins I found in the bathroom drawers.

"You look beautiful." Brendan smiled at me, gently lifting my chin with his finger so I met his eyes. I smiled and leaned into him as he kissed me deeply. "We should go."

"I think we should skip it." I whispered as I ran my hands up and down his chest.

"No." He smiled and kissed me again. "I am responsible for you as well as Jace. We must attend dinner to strategize a plan for what's to come. There is no time to waste."

Unable to argue with that, I nodded and put my arm around him as we left the room, parting just before the dinning area came into view. Jace and Rona were already sitting at the table. Sitting next to each other, fancy place settings in front of each of us. Dinner came in courses. A thick carrot soup, green salad, lamb chops and mashed potatoes, cheese and fruit, a chocolate cake. I couldn't help the small smile that crept onto my face as we ate. Never had I eaten so much good food. Brendan's hand found my thigh and gave it a gentle squeeze as he smiled at me. My smile widened at him as I continued to devour the fantastic meal. Though there was a small amount of regret as it threatened to come up again. I was so full it was almost a dream come true. Something anyone in District 10 could only pray for. Leaning back in my chair, I looked at Brendan with satisfaction. He seemed content enough for what we were going to be doing in the days to come.

"Alright, time to go review the reapings." Rona said as she stood.

"If we have to." I replied and stood up.

Jace was the first to follow her and I can feel Brendan's fingers at the base of my shirt as I follow behind him. Sitting in front of the TV we watch as the reapings from each district were chosen, even on occasion a volunteer.

"We've got this, Letty." Jace tells me as we watch. "District 2 might be a contender but the rest don't look so tough."

"We haven't seen them all yet, Jace." I tell him patiently.

"Hell, I bet I can take out half of them on my own." He said cockily.

"Don't be over confident." Brendan tells him. "You have no idea what skills these people are going in with. What they can do. Looks can be _very_ deceiving."

"I know, I know." Jace said leaning forward. "I'm just saying that from first look they seem easy enough to take."

"I hope you're right." I told him, my eyes still on the screen. "If only we could work as a team I'd be right behind you."

"I'll look out for you, Letty." Jace tells me seriously. The tone in his voice makes me look at him. "For as long as I can."

"And then kill me?" I ask weakly.

He didn't say anything but looked back at the screen. Signing, I pulled my legs up against my chest and watched myself walk up to the stage. Watch as Brendan tries to pull me away. Tries to fight through the Peacekeepers. Tries and fails. I can feel eyes on me. Both of them staring at the couple who's going to be torn apart by this. One tribute. One mentor.

We watch as Jace is called, his confidence, or cockiness, evident as he walks up to the stage. The others will view him as a threat just because of that. Then when 11 is shown, my eyes are drawn to the girl. She looked too young to be chosen. She must be twelve. She had barely begun to live and was now off to die in the arena. Her black hair and dark skin just added to the sense of protection that seemed to have sprouted from no where inside of me. But if I was so scared of dying I couldn't imagine what that little girl would be going through. I had trouble breathing as I thought about what I was going to have to face. The people I might have to kill and what that would do to me. Looking at my hands, I tried to keep my composure. No more tears tonight.

My eyes shoot back to the screen as the girl from 12 volunteers. I watched as she went to the stage. The girl whose name was chosen had been her little sister. She had willingly taken her place. I watched as the little girl screamed as she was pulled away from her sister, knowing full well what had just happened. She screamed as she was taken out of site. The girl, Katniss Everdeen, looks strong and yet I can see the turmoil underneath her façade. She holds herself high in a blue dress with beautifully braided hair. Sitting forward, I watched every move she made. Soon she's joined by Peeta Mellark. A boy of medium height, stocky build, and ashy blond hair that falls in waves over his forehead. Even with him, there is something about him that draws me. I can't place it. Intuition? Precognition? I didn't know. But if there were two that I wanted as an alley in the arena, it would be those two. I look at Brendan and I can tell by the look on his face that he's thinking the same thing that I am. There is something there. Something that neither of us can put a finger on. But it's strong. And we can use all the help we can get.

"Enough for one night." Rona smiles at us. "Time for bed. There is lots to do tomorrow."

"Okay." I smile and make my way to my room with Brendan right behind me.

"May I make a suggestion?" Rona says as I'm reaching for the knob. We both look up at her. "I know you two have been together a long time now. But be careful how much you show to the public."

"They've already seen him fight for me. That may give me an advantage. He may be able to get sponsors who are caught up by a love story." I reply.

"Just be careful." She repeats and walks away.

Looking up at Brendan, he simply reaches in front of me and pushes open the door before leading me inside. Not sure of what to think of her words, I start to undress, finding a tank top and shorts for bed. Brendan stripped to his boxers and moved to the bed.

"What are you thinking?" I asked him as I lay against his side.

"That it doesn't matter what she says." He replied. "I think you're right. If I can use it to our advantage I will. I told you I'd protect you. I wouldn't be able to help myself if I tried. I'm not going to deny my feelings for you when you could be ripped away from me at any moment."

"So, I've become the doomed girlfriend again?" I ask looking up at him.

"No." He said sternly as he ran his fingers through my hair. "I'm just trying to be realistic. I have to be if I'm going to figure out how to be the most helpful to you."

Nodding, I sighed and rested my head on his chest. I was exhausted and yet afraid of sleeping. But the constant feeling of his fingers in my hair as well as the soft kisses he placed made sleep come easily. A peaceful sleep filled with dreams of home. Getting married and building a family. Good dreams. But then there was knocking on the door and Rona's voice telling us another day had begun.


	3. Chapter Three

_**Chapter Three**_

It was like nothing I'd experienced before. Nothing I had expected. We had reached the Capitol and I was swiftly taken away, brought into custody of three very pretentious people at the Remake Center. I had been here only a couple of hours and I'd been scrubby with gritty foam that has not only removed all the dirt but at least the first three layers of my skin, leaving my skin slightly red. My nails have been shaped and polished. Then they took to my body like vultures, removing all the hair they could from my arms, legs, underarms, eyebrows, anything that they think needed to be removed. It hurt like hell. I never thought of myself as homely but my God, I felt like I'd been missing something after they were done.

"You're doing magnificent." Topher, a blue spike haired thirty-something man told me, his skin tinted a slight orange color that was surprisingly complimentary to his hair. His eyes were an icy blue that seemed to smile as he looked at me.

Once they were done they rubbed me down with a lotion that stings at first but then is soothing against my raw skin. A small smile crosses my lips as I take pleasure from the feeling. I feel prettier already. I remember my mother dolling me up as a young girl. She'd let me pick out a dress from her closet and she'd put a gentle layer of makeup on my face, doing my hair with intricate fashions, added gems and such to make it that much better. Similar to those still remaining in my hair.

At times I felt a sense of guilt thinking of everyone who went without in my own district, knowing that I'd have dinner on the table every night. Knowing that we would have things that no one else in the district would have. But my parents never let us feel above anyone else. We knew we were privileged but that didn't mean we were smug. In fact, on several occasions, I'd steal food from our kitchen and give it to the families who I knew were going to bed hungry. I've learned to watch closely to those around me. My father always told me to look and see past what was in front of me. Even now, looking at my prep team, I tried to see past their Capitol exterior, trying to see who they really were.

"I like her." A girl similar to Topher's age grins as she steps next to him. Her name is Fantasia, her hair a bright hot pink with eye shadow to match, long glittery black eyelashes that stick out too far. She giggles like a little school girl and gives a little clap as they take in their finished work.

The last member of my prep team is a quiet young man, Riddley. I was told that he was new to the Capitol and to the stylist team. He looked to be in his mid-twenties, my eyes following him as he circled me. His black hair fell to his shoulders and seemed to shimmer. Not quite with glitter but with something else. His eyes were a navy blue; his skin dyed a gentle green color.

It was crazy the way these people lived. They talk to high and seem to be happy about everything and everything sounds like a question. There's hissing sounds when they use the letter _s_ and their sentences are broken. It's fascinating. It's so different from everything I know that it helped pass the time. Helped me to push aside my reason for being here. For this happening to me. I even smiled at them before they all got giddy at the same time.

"Let's go get Boyd!" Fantasia squeals and they all dart out of the room.

As soon as they're gone, I'm self-conscious of my naked body. I was told that my stylist, Boyd, would want to see me as I am. Take me in before he dolls me up. But it was still an odd feeling. There was only one person who had seen me naked and that was Brendan. Having all these other eyes on me was unsettling but I knew that it was unavoidable.

When Boyd enters the room, there is a sense of shock. He was nothing I had expected. He wasn't exaggerated like the rest of my prep team. He was middle aged. His hair was three shades. Black on top, gray around the middle and a line of white starting at the temple. His face was mildly lined; his thick grey eyebrows were furrowed as he started to circle me. A salt and peppered mustache and goatee surrounding his mouth. But there was a kindness in his eyes when he would glance up, meeting mine for just a moment at a time. He's wearing a charcoal coat, a silver turtleneck underneath with a long black sleek overcoat and shimmering black pants to complete the ensemble.

"Are you going to say anything?" I ask a little sheepishly.

"I'm just taking in the canvas that I will be working with." He said and turns to me.

"Do you paint?" I ask him. He just smiles at me. "Am I going to have to wear a cow suit?" I ask more sadly. He grins even wider. "Oh God, I am, aren't I?"

He steps up to me, holding out my robe. "Come sit with me."

Turning, allowing him to slip the robe onto me, I looked at him cautiously as he suavely put his hand out. Eyeing him, I slowly put my hand in his. He led me to a sitting room, where two comfy looking armchairs sit, a small table in between them and a large coffee table in front of them. We both take a seat and with the press of a button the top of the table splits and another table top is lifted up with our lunch on it. Chicken and chunks of orange cooked in a creamy sauce laid on a bed of pearly white grain, tiny green peas and onions, rolls shaped like flowers, and for dessert, a pudding the color of honey. I look at it with such longing as my mouth begins to water. My mother used to create a similar dish but not with oranges. I couldn't help but think how much I wanted to tell her about it. To tell her that if we used oranges it would be perfect. Suddenly I'm aware of Boyd's eyes on me. Looking up at him, he motions to the food and watches as I devour a good portion, before he too takes a plate.

When we were done eating my stomach is so full that I lean back in my chair, content with the world. My body feels rejuvenated and my belly is slightly bloated from the meal. Without saying anything, Boyd hands me a cup of tea. It was warm, a hint of honey on my tongue. It felt wonderful as it slid down my throat.

"What do you want to wear?" He asks me.

"What?" I frown at him.

"I want to know your opinion. I'm sure you've seen what District 10 has been wearing over the years. I can't imagine you want to wear another cow costume. Perhaps some overalls and a straw hat?"

"No, thank you." I tell him. "We're more than just cattle."

"Then what are you?" He asks.

"We might be the livestock district. But you don't see us raising them. We are a loving and nurturing district. When a mother cow dies when giving birth we don't just shoot the baby. We warm milk and hand feed that baby until he can feed himself. Not only the cows but the horses and goats and chickens and geese. We raise these animals like we would our own. They are as much our family as our children and siblings and parents. It's not just about feeding the Capitol or making sure their chariots look perfect. It's about making a life for us. We are not a wealthy district. We don't ask or receive charity. But we make a life worth living doing work worth doing." I pause and just look at him. He remains silent. "Yes, our livelihood is taken from us, given to those who don't need it. But we continue to raise and nurture and love. Because the Capitol will not break us. They will not run us into the ground. We will survive like we always have. Maybe, someday, we'll even come out on top." I finish, afraid that I said too much. But he asked so I told him.

Meeting his eyes, I kept them as he did the same. The silence grew to such a length I was starting to feel anxious. He should have said something by now. Replied in some way. Even if he made a sound I would know he was thinking something. Finally, looking down into my cup, I heard a grunt from him. Looking up, he had a broad smile on his face.

"You are the brightest canvas I've had in many years." He tells me.

"Come to think of it, I don't remember seeing you before." I replied.

"Yes, well, when you don't have pink curls, or red spikes, one tends to fall into the shadows." He tells me, the smile still on his face.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to offend." I tell him quickly.

"You did nothing of the sort, Love." He said with a small chuckle. "Come, I hope you'll be pleasantly surprised."

In just a matter of hours, I was transformed from a simple country girl, to a magnificent beauty that I hardly recognized. I was wearing a long flowing dress. The top was strapless and white. That was until it reached my middle, tapering off into a beautiful yellow. The color of daffodils in the spring. It flowed down my body. It was so comfortable. There were very delicate, hand crafted daises sewn to the fabric. Almost unnoticeable head on, but as I turned they seemed to shimmer in the light. At the base of the dress there was the illusion of green grass, rising from one to three inches up the dress. My hair was straightened and partially tied back with yellow and white ribbon; very slim braids were placed perfectly throughout, real daisies braided into them. They place my feet in white high heels, big daisies on the top of them the same yellow as the dress. My makeup is light but noticeable, a shade of gold covered the lids of my eyes, and a pale pink was gently brushed on my cheekbones and lips. My neck was adorned with jewelry that looked like grass. As I moved they shifted as a field of green would when the summer winds blow. It seemed almost impossible for it to be possible but he had captured the summer feel of District 10 with a simple dress and some flowers.

"It's wonderful." I tell Boyd on the verge of tears. "I never imagined I could look like this. It's simply divine. No cows." I said and grin at him.

"I'm happy you approve." He said and bows ever so slightly.

"You are a master at your talent, Sir." I reply with a small curtsey.

We both laugh lightly as the doors open and Jace, along with his stylist Tatta, accompanied by his prep team, enter the room. Jace smiles at the sight of me, a smile that makes my cheeks heat up and my head bow. After I control the blush I look up and take him in. He looks magnificent. His costume is so simple and yet elegant. I found it hard to take my eyes off of him. His shirt is white; a vest with the same grassy pattern over it, and his pants a darker shade of the yellow of my dress. His hair is placed over his forehead but brushed to the side in a sensual sort of way. His face looks to have a light layer of makeup, just enough to bring out his hazel eyes. I couldn't place my finger on why he looked so good. There was something about the simplicity. The way he matched me and yet could be seen as a sort of prize in the right eyes. I just hoped that those eyes would be the Capitols.

"You look amazing." Jace tells me as he holds his hand up to me.

I smile at him, putting my hand in his, stepping down from the pedestal Boyd had put me on. "You're not so bad yourself."

We have only a moment to grin at each other before we're herded down to the floor level of the Remake Center. It was basically a huge stable. It reminded me of home. Made me _feel_ like I was home again. There was the smell of horses. Seeing the chariots getting ready, I find ours, a set of four horses harnessed to it, all of them paints. Walking up to them, I go to the lead horse, sensing which one it is. I run my hand up and down its forehead, a gentle nicker coming from his throat. Shutting my eyes, I took a deep breath of him, smiling, a calm drifting over me.

"Smells like home." A voice whispers in my ear as his arm moved across my chest. A hand covering mine. Smiling, I open my eyes, turning to look into Brendan's beautiful blue eyes. "You look amazing."

"Thank you." I smile, leaning up to kiss him, only to be stopped by Topher's hands.

"You are not to ruin the masterpiece." He said eyeing us.

"Sorry." I smile at him.

"We wouldn't want that." Brendan said doing the same.

"Time to get ready." Topher said and pulled me to the back of the chariot.

"I'll see you on the other side." Brendan says and quickly kisses my forehead before he left with Rona.

I watched him go before Topher put his hand on my back, gently motioning to the chariot. Stepping inside of it, Jace and I were positioned. I smiled as Boyd draped a long silk scarf around my neck. It was the same yellow with more white daisies stitched into it. As the chariot moved it would fly freely behind me.

"Just one more thing." Boyd says and holds up a finger, stepping away from the chariot.

"Look at them all." Jace says as the music starts to play and the first few districts start to move forward.

Snow-white horses led the District 1 tributes. Typical. Horses of every color move out ahead of us. The streets are lined with people. The ride is about twenty minutes long, ending in the City Circle, where they will welcome us, play the anthem, and escort us into the Training Center, which will be our home, or rather, our prison until the Games begin.

"I think I'm going to freak out." I tell him, looking for comfort in his face.

He keeps his eyes on the door for a moment before looking at me. "I think I'll freak out with you."

"That's not very comforting." I tell him straight faced.

It took only a few moments before we both start laughing. A laugh full of anxiousness and fear. My side hurt when we finally stopped. Then Boyd reappeared with Topher, both carrying a kid. Not the human kind but two of the cutest baby goats I've ever seen. One is grey with splashes of white. The other is cream in color. The one Boyd hands to me, the cream, has a white streak down its face.

"Boyd…" I said as I cradle the baby in my arms.

"I thought you might enjoy a little company on this venture." He smiles at me.

Grinning at him, for a moment I can't speak. This was completely unexpected. The feelings that are coming to the surface. I can't hate him. No matter what happens to me, I realize that he is doing nothing but help me.

"Thank you." I finally tell him. "Thank you so much."

Boyd simply bows his head and smiles at me. "Now for the challenge of keeping your composure."

"What do you want us to do?" I asked him.

"Be stoic." He tells us. "Show your strength, Jace. Letty…beautiful Letty…" He said and pauses. "Your very personality is nurturing. Take care of your baby on this ride."

"Thank you, Boyd. I really mean that." I smile at him, tears spring to my eyes.

"Don't do that." He said putting his hand on my arm. "Go knock 'em dead."

Laughing, I nodded and watched as he fell back, going out the same way Brendan and Rona did. Taking a deep breath, I look up at Jace. He simply winks and smiles, gently nudging me. Lowering my head, I take in the sweet smell of the baby goat. He's perfect as he remains dozing in my arms, lifting his head only once to gently nibble my nose. Giggling and cooing to him, it was a happy moment, until the chariot started to move.

Composing myself the best I can, I try and relax my face. Having the baby goat makes it easier. Focusing on him and not the thousands of people that are watching us. Unsure of what to expect, the last thing I expected was a moment of hushed silence before the crowd erupted with cheers. Keeping my stoic appearance, I held my head high, occasionally looking down at the kid, not having to fake the mothering look I could feel move over my face.

"Look at us." Jace says softly to me.

I hadn't wanted to look at us. Didn't want to see us on the big screen being driven around the Capitol. Afraid of what we looked like to the public.

"Go on." He says. "Look."

Finally lifting my head, my eyes moving to the screen, a smile creeps onto my face as I take us in. We look magnificent. The yellows are perfect, the kids adding just the right touch. I place a gentle kiss on the kids head before I look up at Jace. We exchange a smile before remembering our place. Stoic. We both lower our heads before returning to our expressions to what they should be. Only a moment lost to the impossibility of the Capitol. A few moments pass and the crowd erupted in even louder cheers. They escalated and stayed as an enormous volume as our ride grew to an end.

The twelve chariots fill the loop of the City Circle. People have filled every side street, every window. The most prestigious of the Capitols people. The horses take us up to President Snow's mansion, and we come to a halt. Districts 11 and 12 soon follow us. As soon as 12 have stopped the music stopped abruptly. My eyes linger on the tributes from 12. There is something about them. Something about their faces and their linked fingers that makes it hard to look away. When the President starts speaking I finally look up to the balcony he's speaking from. He's a small, thin man, with paper-white hair. There is something about him that makes me very uncomfortable. He gives the traditional speech, cutting to the tributes as he spoke. I notice that District 12 is getting more than their fair share of airtime. I see us just slightly more than the rest as well, but it's clear that the last district is capturing the eyes of the people. I can see why. They're flaming outfits make them look more amazing then any tribute I have ever seen in my life. Or that I've ever heard of for that matter. When the President in done, music accompanies us as we make one more pass around the circle before we are led into the Training Center.

The doors have barely closed behind us when we are swarmed by our prep teams. Jace's are all over him as Topher, Fantasia, and Riddley started babbling on to me. I hold tight to the kid as they shout their praise and congratulations. Though most eyes are still on District 12. We are receiving a few glares but we're not as extraordinary as they are. For a moment I even feel a pang of envy, and then Boyd and Tatta appear.

"You were wonderful." Boyd smiles at me.

"I don't know." I smile back. "I faltered for a moment there. We both did."

"Yes, I caught that. But I don't think anyone else did. If I wasn't staring at you the whole time I would have missed it too." He replies as he helps me from the chariot. Smiling, I turn and am again caught up in the tributes two chariots away from me. "You're right to watch them." Boyd says quietly in my ear. "Everyone is already talking about them. They'll either make favorable allies or fearsome enemies."

"I'm gathering that." I reply still locked onto them.


	4. Chapter Four

_**Chapter Four**_

Our time in the Capitol progressed quickly. It was a tight schedule they had us on and Rona was more than eager to keep us on time and right now it was training time. The Training Center has a tower designed exclusively for the tributes and their teams, which will be our home until the actual Games begin. Each district has an entire floor. You simply step onto an elevator and press the number of your district. Simple as that.

When I was little my dad used to take me to the Justice Building late in the afternoon when no one was around. We'd go up and down it, playing games. As we enter the crystal elevator, watching the people shrink below us, I think of him. Of everything he taught me. He was such a good man. My favorite out of anyone in my life. Even Brendan cannot replace the love I have for my father. As I think about it, I couldn't wait to get out of it.

When the door opens, I rush out, wanting to try and rid the memory from my mind. Not wanting to hold onto it. Knowing that it would be a weakness if I tried to keep all of the emotion. I was going to have to kill people in just a matter of days. I didn't have the luxury of being weak. Of remembering everything I am. I was going to lose that. Lose that in order to do what I must. What I must.

"Where'd you go?" I hear Brendan whisper as I stand just outside the elevator.

Looking up at him, I manage a smile. "Sorry, just remembering."

"Come with me." He smiles and leads me to my quarters.

It's half the size of our house. There are so many buttons and gadgets I don't even know where to begin. It helps take my mind off of things as I explore. Brendan just grins at me and shows me how to use everything. This wasn't the first or last time he's been here. It was still such a relief to have him with me. To have him here to teach and comfort me.

"To have and to hold." He whispers in my ear, knowing what I'm thinking.

"When we get back." I said looking up at him. "We'll do it. No matter what my father says."

"I'll hold you to that." He smiles but I can hear a level of pain hidden in his words.

In the next moment he's kissing me. His lips urgent against mine. They move to my jaw line and then to my neck, cleavage, and abdomen. He's tearing off my clothes as he turns on the water in the shower. The fabric of his shirt tears easily as I forcefully remove it from his body. His toned chest presses against my now naked one. He sheds the rest of his clothes and lifts me into his arms, our bodies hot against each other, intensifying as he steps under the hot water. The glass walls fog over, only being disturbed by our hands as we make love to each other. Making love as if it's the last time we'll get the chance.

Wrapped in just a sheet, we lay in each other's arms. Content. Happy even. With him everything else fades to black. With him it's just the two of us. Just the way two people are supposed to be. Two people who fell in love. We should be getting married and starting a family. Instead, we lay in each other's arms hoping that I live out the week. Hoping that I will, somehow, end up alive at the end of the Hunger Games. But I was beginning to fear that he was coming to terms with the probability of me walking away from all of this. Of _living_. I couldn't help but think about it as he gently trailed his fingers up and down my arm.

"I don't want this to end." I tell him.

"It won't." He replies kissing my hair.

"Brendan…" I said leaning up on my elbow so I can look at him.

"Letty, don't even try it." He said sitting up. Pulling the sheet up to cover myself, I cringe ever so slightly by his harsh tone. "We're not going to do this. Especially not today."

"Then when?" I ask. My own tone turning harsh. "When are we supposed to say goodbye? When are you going to face the fact that there is a good chance I'm not coming back?" Getting out of bed, he starts to pace in front of me. "The sooner you accept that the better it will be for both of us. Better for you so you don't spend the rest of your life mourning me."

"Stop!" He yells jerking me to my feet by my arm. "How am I supposed to get you sponsors if I've already accepted your doom? We are not going to say goodbye. Not ever!"

"You're hurting me." I tell him in a tiny voice.

"I'll hurt you more than that if you don't knock it off." He tells me, shoving me away from him, causing me to fall back onto the bed. "We keep having these moments of happiness and you keep ruining them with your self-pity. You are better than this. So, so much better. If anyone should be breaking down it's me. I've at least earned it." He paces away from me again. I know he's not done. "I've lived through this. Me." He says getting in my face. "I know you're capable of so much more. Your woe-is-me attitude is not going to get either of us anywhere. You are going to listen to me. You are going to stop feeling sorry for yourself. No matter how hard it gets or how good the other tributes are. You…_you_…are going to rise above and kick their sorry asses. You are _not_ going to give up. Not on the Games and sure as hell not on me. Do you understand me?"

"I do." I reply quickly, nodding at him.

"Good." He said and pulls me up into his arms. "I love you like the stars love the moon. I will see you through this no matter what. I will get you the sponsors you need and you will make it through the Games."

"Okay." I say as tears slide down my cheeks. "I'm sorry. I just don't want to leave anything unsaid."

"Do you love me?" He asks taking my head in his hands.

"Of course I do. You're my whole world." I reply.

"Then nothing will be left unsaid." He says softly and kisses me passionately. "Are we done then with all of the depressing talk?"

"Yes, sir. Whatever you say, sir." I smile up at him.

"Now you're just mocking me." He said with a half-smile.

"Yes I am." I say and kiss him again.

Just then there is a small knock on the door. Rona is calling us to supper. We dress in silence. A tension has built around us and I'm completely to blame. All I want to do is share everything I'm feeling with him. Everything I'm thinking. But he doesn't want to hear it. He wants the focused me. The me that I've been for him for years. He's not used to a weaker me. Guilt seeps into me for letting me become the weak one. For not being as strong as I usually am. For letting the Games get the better of me.

"I'm sorry." I tell me as we stand in front of the door. "I didn't mean to upset you. That's the last thing I want."

"I know." He tells me and brushes my cheek. "We should get out there."

Nodding, he opens the door for me. We go to the main room to see both Boyd and Tatta with Rona and Jace on the balcony. Seeing Boyd makes me feel better. At least I'll have someone to talk to if Brendan decides to give me the cold shoulder. Though I knew I deserved it.

"Letty." Boyd says sweetly as he steps up to me.

"Hello, Boyd. I'm glad you're here." I smile back.

"I sense tension." He says as he eyes Brendan.

"Maybe a little." I reply honestly.

"Hide it well. People know of your relationship. They expect to see him fight for you." He tells me as he hands me a glass of chilled red wine.

I like wine. My father has a stash back home. He's allowed my brothers and me to acquire a taste for the liquor. Drinking it now is more calming then almost anything else. Shutting my eyes, I let the taste linger on my tongue.

"Mmm. Reminds me of home." I tell Boyd.

Feeling a gentle hand on my back, I lean into Brendan as his arm moves around me. Soon we are ushered into the dining room and sat before the fancy settings. Another spread of fine food is delivered to us by nice dressed servers. None of them utter a word. The more I watched them something flickers in my memory and I glance at Brendan. He simply nods and refuses to look at them. An Avox. Both of them. Doing the same, I spend an unusual time staring at my plate when they're in the room. Once their gone I find myself watching the door they enter and leave from, questions moving through my head.

There is one girl and one boy server. Both look around my age. Both hold a defeated look and never look any of us in the eye. The girl has soft long blond hair, is a little too skinny, and seems to have trouble swallowing. Brendan has told me why that is. The boy is the same, with shorter hair and seems to have more meat on him. They look like they could be twins. It's disturbing.

Trying not to think about it, I delve into the meal. It's as exquisite as the last. Mushroom soup, bitter greens with tomatoes the size of peas, rare roast beef sliced as thin as paper, noodles in green sauce, cheese that melts on your tongue served with sweet blue grapes. It was so scrumptious that I couldn't help but eat as much as I possibly could. My stomach was so full but I kept putting more and more into my mouth. My stomach was distended when I finally sat back. We were all laughing about something. Something I don't even remember hearing. Then we all fell silent. A food induced stupor. Boyd and Tatta excused themselves and then it was just the four of us. It seemed that we all had something to say but no one wanted to speak first. I wasn't surprised when Jace spoke first.

"Do you have a plan for us?" He asked Brendan.

"Yes, I do." He replied.

"Well?"

Brendan looks at him a moment before leaning forward on the table. "You'll have two options. Go it alone or find allies."

"Allies?!" Jace exclaims. "You want us to _befriend_ the people who are trying to kill us?"

"Yes." I add quickly. "It may mean the difference between life and death. The point is to stay alive as long as possible. To _win_ even."

"So what you're saying is that you want us to make friends just to kill them in the end? That would never work!" His anger is showing.

"Jace, please, be reasonable. He survived the Games. He has mentored the Games for years. We need to trust his judgment." I said tapping the table with my pointer finger.

"You're blinded!" He yells standing, beginning to pace. "You're involved with him! How can I even begin to trust either of you?"

"Jace!" Brendan yells getting to his feet. "I'm only trying to help you. You asked if I had a plan. I'm trying to explain to you what I think. You don't need to get so defensive."

Jace nods and leans closer to Brendan, speaking in a calmer voice, "Your only plan is to save your little whore."

Brendan's face remained blank. I immediately reached out for him, but it's too late. Jace is on the ground, clutching his jaw. Brendan walks around the table and kicks him in the abdomen. Flying out of my chair, I grab Brendan's arm, pulling him back. He struggles against me but I manage to wrap my arm around his torso.

"Enough!" I yell at him. He calms and relaxes in my grasp. "Enough, Brendan."

His eyes met mine and after a long pause he nods and lowers his head. Turning to Jace, I kneel next to him. He's rocking as he waits for the pain to subside in his stomach. Sighing, I make sure he meets my eyes.

"Yes, I'm involved with him. We are committed to each other." I tell him gently. "But don't you think for one second that either of us is writing you off. I will protect you. I will make sure that you are not killed and we will come home. I don't know how. But I will do everything I can to make sure that you survive."

"They'll never allow it." He said with difficulty as he moved to his hands and knees, one arm wrapped around his middle.

"We'll figure something out." I tell him. "I care about you Jace. I've known you for a long time now. You and your cocky attitude. Between the two of us I think we can last a while."

"I'm not cocky, I'm confident." He said with a small smile.

He was calming down now. I smile at him, "No, you're cocky."

"I don't agree with this." He said with a discouraged tone.

"We haven't finished letting him talk." I state. He just looks at me. Sighing, I bow my head before looking up at him. "How long do you think you'll last if you're all on your own?"

"Long enough." He says sitting and facing me.

"Long enough isn't going to cut it." I tell him shaking my head. "I've already picked who I want for an ally. I've decided that I can't do this alone. I want the support of my district. I want to come home. I don't want to die."

"Neither do I."

"Then let me help you. Let others help you."

"I don't know." He said shaking his head.

"Then what do you think we should do?" I sigh.

"Run." He answers quickly. "Run. Hide. Don't come out until absolutely necessary."

Looking in his eyes, I could see how much he believed in what he was saying. "You're going to have to kill someone eventually." I tell him.

"I know. I can do it. But I'm going to wait for the opportune moment."

A sense of fear started to creep into me. There was something there that I had never seen before. Something that told me that it didn't matter if we came from the same district. Something told me that I wasn't going to be able to turn my back to him. Something was telling me that I would end up with a knife in it.

"Listen, tomorrows the first day of training." Brendan said breaking the silence. "We should get some sleep."

Nodding at him, I stand and step away from Jace, watching him stand as I take Brendan's hand. He disappeared down the corridor to his room. Brendan and I followed behind him, making sure his door closed before briskly going to my room and closing the door behind us.

"What's the matter?" He asks me.

"I don't know. He's not the Jace I know. He's turning into something else." I reply.

"He's dangerous." He said sitting on the bed.

Sitting next to him I sigh, "Very."

"You're going to have to split from him."

"I can do that." I nod.

"Are you sure? I know it's not what we originally planned." He says sweetly, moving to his knees in front of me.

"It'll be fine." I reply with a smile, taking his hands in mine. "I'll break from the Cornucopia and find allies later."

"Remember. Run. You need to run from the Cornucopia and take cover wherever you can."

"I'm going to need supplies." I tell him.

"You'll manage." He tells me slightly demanding.

"Fine." I say and nod.

Sighing, he kisses my forehead and pulls back the covers. "We should try and get some sleep."

"Yes, please." I smile and wait for him to lie down before snuggling against his chest.

Feeling his warmth along the length of my body brings me comfort. The feeling of his chest rising and falling. The steady, strong sound of his beating heart, pumping life through him. My brows furrow as my mind moves to unhappy places, but am calmed as he kisses my lips sweetly, letting them linger just long enough. Finally falling asleep as he gently caressed my skin.


	5. Chapter Five

_**Chapter Five**_

Sleep.

It seemed to be a miracle to be sleeping at all.

For most of the night I have a dreamless sleep, nestled next to Brendan. At some point in the night I heard him leave. At the time I didn't think much of it. Staying in bed, I watched the door, seeing if he'd come back. After a few minutes I knew that he needed time alone. I didn't know what he was doing but if he didn't wake me for it then it was his business.

Falling back asleep, dreams now started to seep in. They went from good dreams of being home, lying underneath an apple tree with Brendan and Kahn, to downright horror. Dreams of being in the arena. Dreams of where I witnessed Brendan being killed, a bloody knife in my hands. So many dreams of my family's death. Zephyr trying to protect me only to die in the end. An endless screaming ever in the background only to discover that it was me.

Shooting awake, the suns first rays were starting to filter through the window. I was drenched in sweat. The ferocity of my dreams was unexpected. I had been sleeping rather well since I'd be chosen as tribute. Apparently it had nothing to do with me trying to be strong and everything to do with Brendan being close to me. As much of a comfort as it was to know that we were connected on a level most wouldn't understand, but my dreams took away that feeling as the images replayed over and over again in my head.

Putting my hand to my head I sat up, hanging my legs over the edge of the bed. There was a subtle throbbing in my head. Finally getting up I went to the bathroom, messing with all the buttons till a steady stream of perfectly hot water fell over my hand. Stepping underneath it, I sighed, enjoying the warmth of it. Pressing other buttons I wasted much of whatever was in them until I figured out which each one was. Washing my hair with lavender scented shampoo, I conditioned it and scrubbing my body with foam that left my skin feeling rejuvenated and smelled of Japanese cherry blossom with a hint of perfume. It was wonderful.

Once I was rinsed, I stepped out onto a mat that blew me dry, hair and all. Rubbing myself down with lotion I went back out to see an outfit waiting for me. There's a pair of tight black pants, a short sleeved yellow tunic, and leather shoes. I put them on and leave, walking down to the dining room. There is a spread already laid out for us. I'm the first to arrive. The Avox boy is there, he quickly looks at me before finished what he was doing and quickly leaves. Turning, I went back down the hall to Brendan's room. Softly opening the door I saw him sitting at a desk, papers all over it acting as his pillow. Walking over to him I gently put my hands on his arms, leaning down, placing a kiss on his neck. He didn't stir. He must have been up most of the night.

"Baby?" I said softly next to his ear. "Brendan, its morning."

He still didn't move. Smiling, I ran my fingers through his hair before kneeling next to him. Putting my hand on his thigh I squeezed gently. He jerked awake, flying against the back of the chair. I smiled up at him as I gently ran my hands up and down his thighs.

"Morning." I smile.

"Morning." He said taking my hand in his.

Standing, I sat myself in his lap. "Were you up all night?" I ask as I run my fingers through his hair. He nodded. "What were you doing?"

"Just trying to figure out how to get sponsors. How to help." He replied.

"You're going to do fine." I smile and kiss him. "But you should get in the shower. Training is going to start soon." I tell him as I stand, pulling him to his feet.

"You remember what to do?" He asks as he strips on his way to the bathroom.

"Yes, I do." I reply as I fall onto his bed.

The door is open and I can see him in the shower. Feeling the mischievous smile creep onto my face, I take him in, remembering all the moments we've shared together. At least I can't say that I haven't lived at all. Even if I was going to die in the Games I can't say that I haven't known happiness. That I haven't known love. Love. I've known love. I see and feel it every day of my life. I'm not as worried as I was. I'm prepared. I know I am. After these few days of training I'll be able to defend myself better than I can now, and even now I am not weak. I know what to do. Brenden has been working with me for years. It was how he showed me what was going on inside his head when he thought of the Games. He had helped me more than he knows without even trying. The only drawback is that after these few days are up I'll be taken from Brendan. That'll be the one thing that brings me down. Without him I'm only half a person. If there is one thing I need to do before the Games start it's to separate myself from him. To not rely on him to physically be there. I know he will never be far but he can't come into the arena with me. He'll be on the outside and I need to make that separation inside myself so it doesn't hinder me in the arena. It was going to be the biggest challenge of this whole experience.

"Ready?" He asks as he pulls on an outfit. "What is it?" He frowns seeing my expression.

"I was just thinking." I reply sitting up.

Sighing, he sits next to me. "You're not going to try and say goodbye again are you?"

"No." I smile at him.

"Then what is it?"

"I'm trying to think of a way to separate myself from you." I tell him honestly.

"What?" He frowns harder.

"Not like that." I said taking his hand. "I'm so dependent on you that most of the time I don't even realize it." I explain. "I was sleeping so well last night. Then you left and I was plagued with nightmares." He puts his other hand over mine. "When you're with me everything is okay. But as soon as you leave it's like my subconscious knows and everything that I'm afraid of or concerned about just rises to the surface. I need to separate that need or I'm going to fail in the Games. I need to be able to last without you by my side. To be able to think and react. We are one, you and I. But this is the one place I can't take you with me."

"I suppose this is all my fault." He tells me with a sad smile. I frown at him questioningly. "I've been so dependent on you for years, only thinking of what would happen if I didn't have you. I never thought of how it affected you. You've always been the strong one. The one who watches over me. You've been taking care of me so long that I haven't even thought of the role being reversed. Well here we are. Our roles are reversed. It's my turn to be strong and to take care of you."

"Your reach is limited." I state. "There is only so much you can do. And I'm still afraid that you aren't as strong as you need to be. When I was chosen you nearly reverted into that stammering boy I first met. You can't go there. I'm going to make Rona promise me not to let you watch if you can't keep control of yourself."

"I'm strong enough, Letty." He tells me matter-of-factly. "For you I will be strong enough."

"Okay." I smile and kiss him. "Okay." I repeated with a sigh.

We joined the others for breakfast. No one really saying anything. I load my plate with eggs, bacon, and some sort of potato dish. Drink several glasses of orange juice and then nibble on a roll while I wait for everyone else to be done. I kept trying to go through what to expect during training. Who to talk to. If it was too soon to try and create the beginning of an ally. I'd have three days to decide. Then the last afternoon I'd have to wow the Gamemakers in a private session.

"We should go." Rona tells us, even though none of us seem too eager to get to our feet.

As I start to get up, I glance at Jace to find his eyes on me. I freeze, unsure of what the look is telling me. He holds my eyes only a moment longer before standing and making his way to the elevator. Brendan puts his hand against my lower back as we step into the elevator. Rona hit the button and we were soon dropping to the level below ground where the training is held.

The doors open into an enormous gymnasium filled with various weapons and obstacle courses. We are the third set to arrive. District 4 and 7 are already here. The looks on their faces were anything but encouraging. They looked just as scared as I felt. Brendan took my hand briefly, looking at me with a confident smile on his face. I leaned up and kissed him before stepping out of the elevator. Jace was already getting the number 10 pinned to his back. Without looking back at my man, I moved to Jace, getting pinned as well, before joining the other tributes that were all standing together. You could feel the tension in the air. No one was saying anything. Just simply standing and eyeing each other. Well, all of us but Jace. His arrogance was back and it was radiating off of him. It wasn't in a good way. He was going to look cocky and the others would play off that and pick him off before he could realize they were even there.

"So, livestock huh?" The male tribute from 7 says to me.

Looking at him, I was shocked he said anything at all. He was tall with semi-long dark down hair that fell into his eyes, causing him to almost continuously shake his head to clear them. His eyes were a deep brown, the look of chocolate. Coming from the lumber district his arms were large and muscular, his chest well-toned.

"Yes." I finally tell him. "Lumber, huh?" His cheeks flush as he nods. Smiling, I nod with him. "Are you, uh, having fun yet?" I asked jokingly.

He just looks at me. The silence grew so long that I started to feel uncomfortable, then he burst with laughter. The hardest laughter I'd heard in days. It was the best sound I'd heard since I'd arrived. He shakes his head and gently shoves me.

"No, I'm really not." He says as he regained control of himself.

I even caught the others smiling. All but Jace. "But you have to admit, the food is _amazing_."

"Yes it is." He nods and smiles down at me. "Efren." He said holding out his hand.

"Letty." I reply shaking it.

"This is Livi." He said motioning to his other tribute. She's a petite girl with straight, medium length black hair with bangs that are brushed diagonally across her forehead. She looks harmless enough but the look her eyes was telling me something different.

She just nods at me when I smile at her. "Friendly." I say to Efren.

"You learn to like her." He winks at me causing me to grin at him.

It was a short exchange but a connection had been made. With a body like his, he could do a lot of damage to the others. If I could gain him as an ally I would be better off. Able to survive longer than just me and my slight form. Nothing more was said after that. The other tributes started to filter in. One after the other our small circle grows as everyone moves to take their place amongst us.

When twenty-two of us had arrived, there was just one more set to appear. District 12. I was eager for them to arrive. I was still sure that if I was to have any success in the arena, it would lie with them. My stomach did a flip when the elevator opened and they appeared in matching maroon shirts.

"What the hell?" Jace says frowning in their direction. "Why do they always look so buddy-buddy?"

"I don't know." I reply but still feel like life lies with them.

Once they join the group, the head trainer, a tall, athletic woman named Atala steps up and begins to explain the training schedule. Experts in each skill will remain at their stations. We will be free to travel from area to area as we choose, per our mentor's instructions. Some of the stations teach survival skills, other fighting techniques. We are forbidden to engage in any combative exercise with another tribute. There are assistants on hand if we want to practice with a partner. I know Jace talked to Brendan in private and I knew what to do before we even came here.

As Atala starts to read through all the stations, my eyes keep drifting around the circle. The tributes from 1 and 2 are formidable. In fact, there are several that look like they could take me on with ease. But there are more that looks underfed and weak. There are bones visible and sunken eyes. Many that look so tired that you could blow on them and they'd fall over. Looking up at Jace all I see is confidence. He looks at everyone like he is a God, ready to smite them at any moment. Then there was me. Modest. Afraid. But they don't know what I can do yet. The next few days would be very interesting.

There was a nudge against my arm and I looked up into Efren's brown eyes. "So, where to first?" He asks.

"You want to tag along with me?" I frown at him.

He waits as everyone else but Jace starts to disperse. "I'm not stupid, Letty. We all know we're going to need help in the arena. I'm someone who's willing to admit it."

"Letty." Jace says looking down at me.

"It's okay." I say looking up at him.

"Are we going to be like 12 and stick together or are we going to do our own thing?" He asks.

"I trust you." I reply.

"Okay." He nods and runs his hand down my arm before walking away.

"So?" Efren asked looking around at all the different stations.

Without saying anything, I moved toward the edible plants station. We spent over an hour there, asking questions and learning everything we could fit into our heads. Then we moved to edible insects. We memorized color patterns and sizes. At which stage it can be eaten or becomes toxic. Knowing how to use the poisonous ones to our advantage. We remained among the two stations, watching the others as we learned until lunch was called. We were served in a dining room off of the gymnasium, a marvelous spread that did not disappoint.

"How's it going with the tree guy?" Jace asks as he takes a seat next to me after Efren had walked away.

"It's going fine." I reply. "We're not going to starve." Jace nods at me. "And you? Learning anything fun?"

"I've perfected some knife skills. Practiced with the spear. Not very good at it but that's why we're here." He tells me.

"Yeah." I say nodding as I guzzle some water.

"What about him?" Jace said nodding toward Efren. "Learn anything that might be of use?"

"We've been talking but he seems to be a bit of an amateur." I tell him. "Though he has a lot of strength. I haven't seen him use it yet but he will at some point over the next few days. If he doesn't then we'll know what his special talent is."

"What about you?" He asks curiously. "What is your special talent?"

"Wouldn't you like to know?" I grin at him.

He laughs and shakes his head. "You're just full of secrets."

"You have no idea." I smile as Efren rejoins me.

"Hey." He says to Jace.

"Hey." Jace replies and a silence falls between the three of us.

Soon lunch is over and we're back to moving through the stations. I work on my archery while Efren works on snares. All the while I'm thinking about Brendan. Going through everything in my head. Wondering if I'm making the right decision about letting Efren accompany me. Part of me doesn't want him to know too much in case he uses it against me in the arena. But he seems to be trustworthy and I already decided that I wanted allies. Only he wasn't the one I had expected. Only it seemed that instead of choosing for myself, I had been chosen. Every time I moved or did something I felt the eyes of District 7 on me.

As much as I felt I was being watched, I was doing just as much watching. I watched the tributes from District 12. They practiced knots and snares, and camouflage. All the while they are with each other. They never separated for a minute. I tried to figure out what their angle is. What they hope to gain from never being apart. Clearly there is something there. The way Peeta looks at her. She moves. He moves. My eyes find Jace talking to a girl who has a face that resembles a fox. It was almost uncanny the resemblance she had to a fox. Right down to the red hair. For a moment there was a sense of possessiveness toward him. That despite the circumstances he still belonged to me.

"You okay?" Efren asked as he rejoined me.

"Yeah, I'm fine." I reply with a small smile.

"It's hard isn't it?" He said quietly.

"Is what?" I counter.

"Trying to separate your feelings." He states.

Smiling, I nod at him. "Very much so." I admit.

He didn't reply as Livi came and squatted next to us as we perfected a snare that would pull its victim into the air, hanging it upside down.

"Hey." She said to Efren.

They started to talk and I stood, walking over to where Jace was just finishing a boxing lesson.

"Hi." I say with a sigh.

"Everything okay?" He asks as he wipes the sweat from his face and arms with a towel.

"No." I reply as I lean against a table.

"Lumber boy?"

"This whole thing, Jace." I say looking up at him. "We're in the Hunger Games. We're training to kill each other."

"I know." He said and leans next to me. "And I'm sorry."

"For what?" I ask him.

He just looks at me before smiling. "Nothing." He said and nudged me.

"Train with me?" I ask him.

He nods and we move on to the gauntlet, running through it until we both have successfully completed it. From there we went to camouflage and then to spears for the remainder of day one. When we finally stepped into the elevator and returned to the 10th floor we were both exhausted. I hadn't even put my all into it but still managed to drain myself of all energy.

"You did well today." Jace says on the short ride.

"So did you." I tell him.

The door opens to a smiling Rona and a stoic Brendan. Jace and I step up to them. I smile at Brendan, so happy to see him.

"Well, how'd it go?" Rona asked.

"It went fine." Jace replies. "Letty made a friend."

Both of them look at me. "The boy tribute from 7. His name is Efren and seems to be a decent guy. I'm not holding my breath or anything but he might make a good ally."

"What about 12?" Brendan asks.

"I never talked to them. They stayed with each other the entire time. They were never apart. I don't know what their plan is but it's definitely something they're doing together." I reply.

"Alright, well, we can discuss this more at dinner." Rona smiles. "You two should go get cleaned up."

Nodding, I looked at Brendan before going to my room. Brendan was right behind me. As soon as the door was shut, I was spun around, my body slamming into his. His hands gripped my arms as he looked down at me. Meeting his eyes, there was such love and intensity in them. A passion in them that I had never seen before. Without a word he gently moved me backward, stripping my body as he blindly led me. My hands removed his shirt and undid his pants as I felt the tile of the bathroom floor. Soon the water was running and he lifted me up into his arms. My legs wrapped around his waist as our lips met in a passionate kiss. The sound of the water helped drown out the moans that escaped both of our mouths as we moved from wall to wall. When we finally stood still, I had my arms wrapped around him, placing gentle kisses along his shoulder as he buried his face in my neck, his fingers trailing up and down my back. When he lifted his head, I did the same, meeting his eyes. With our eyes locked he lowered his head and kissed me. Gripping him tighter, my body molded perfectly to his. If there was ever one person meant for me then I knew that that was this man. It wasn't what he did or what he said. It was all in the moments when he didn't say anything. It was the look in his eyes. The feel of his touch. He said it best when he said nothing at all.

"I love you…so much." He whispered, his breath hot against my neck, his lips right next to my ear.

"I love you more." I whisper back, my lips finding his again.

"Not possible." He tells me as he puts his forehead against mine.

Smiling, I kissed him again. "I'll prove to you that I love you more."

"How?" He asks putting a sexy half smile on his face.

"I'm going to win the Games." I whisper.

He smiles but it's not nearly as genuine as it usually is. He pulls me against him again as he heaves a heavy sigh. Resting my head against his chest, I listen to his heartbeat, knowing what he's not saying, making my heart hurt for him. But words almost mean nothing at this point. Even if I tried to comfort him it would only help for maybe a day until the weight of our circumstances drop down on us once again.

After getting dressed and eating dinner, I left Brendan and Jace alone to discuss training and such. I didn't want to talk about it anymore today. Taking my leave, I wandered our quarters, finding a door leading to the roof. Curious, I pushed it open and climbed the stairs until I see a dome-shaped room with a door to the outside. Stepping out into the cool night air, my breath catches at the sight. The Capitol twinkles like a thousand fireflies. Smiling, I went to the railing that ran along the edge and wrapped my arms around myself as I looked out over this strange place. Looking down I can hear the cars and occasional yell as everyone moved about their normal days. None caring who lay trapped in the Training Center. Sighing, I moved around the other side of the dome to find a garden. There are flower beds and potted trees. From the branches hang hundreds of wind chimes. Smiling, I sit on a bench and listen to the chimes as they gently swing back and forth as a gentle wind passes through.

My mind moved through everything that had happened. Everything that I felt and thought. Thinking of all those I cared about. Unexpected tears came to my eyes. I was willing to let them come. While alone, I was willing to have my breakdown and return to them fresh and devoid of unwanted emotion. Knowing that the closer the Games got the stronger I would have to be. For Brendan. But as soon as the tears are on the verge of spilling over, I hear a sound and look up to see a boy watching me. It's Peeta Mellark from District 12.


End file.
